Gershom Umar

WHY AMERICA NEEDS MORE TOLERANCE TO END RACIAL CONFLICTS, NOT MORE LOVE.

Maybe we went about it the wrong way.

BY 

Gershom Umar

Following recent events in America –the reported killings of black people around the country, police brutality and the #BlackLivesMatter movement — it has become imperative that we go back to the drawing board to better understand why all of these seem to be happening now.

Over the last 400 years, the African 

Americans living in America have had to endure amongst other types of oppression, a systemic oppression. Their whole lives are left at the mercy of the prevailing politics of the time. It began with the slave trade. During that time, after a lot of back and forth, through a combined effort of effective activism, international outcry and moral awakening, it made sense to the leaders of the free world, to abolish the slave trade. But then that left a question of what next to do with these slaves turned free folks. So, although slaves became free, those who granted them that freedom made it clear that they weren’t in fact, free to do what was obtainable with their white neighbors. Hence, segregation.

Again, activism, moral awakening and international outcry, drew the attention of the leading politicians then, to pass laws that made segregation legally actionable. Mind you, just because a nation publicly, congressionally and judicially rejects a societal ill, more would need to be done to make such policies acceptable to its citizens. Especially where those citizens can indulge in those repudiated actions behind the eyes of the law. That was a lesson African Americans soon got to learn.

However, against all odds, against the open hate and antagonistic behaviors demonstrated towards these African Americans, they managed to thrive. Somehow, they learnt to ignore those resentments, or sometimes, get justice by some really fine few people willing to stand for the right thing. Still, as the rest of the world recently learnt, all was not okay. Black people still got murdered in the “wrong neighbourhood” by self-identified white supremacists, like in the case of Ahmaud Arbery. Others like George Floyd got murdered by the police who were sworn to protect them, and so it goes.

Now, judging by the increased number of protests ongoing in different parts of the country, the number of cases where the police used excessive and unnecessary force on people of color, the drummed up solidarity across the globe for the Black Lives Matter Movement, it is safe to say that the bubble that is the fairy tale of equity and fairness in the American dream is about to be burst! The solution this time, cannot be some concession or some halfhearted political gesture. It is time to return to the foundation and introduce values that were missing from the get-go.

So, the question remains, what do we do differently to achieve a peaceful co-existence? Amy Chua was able to study civilizations, empires and superpowers in some of her research. In her book Day of Empire, she posits that Tolerance is a key ingredient for the survival of any civilization or empire. An excerpt from her book says, “indeed, in every case tolerance was indispensable to the achievement of hegemony. Just as strikingly, the decline of Empire has repeatedly coincided with intolerance and xenophobia.”

It might appear that there is in fact, a direct link between a society that upholds inclusiveness and tolerance of different types of people, ethnicity and religions, with a blossoming nation, a thriving economy and heightened influence in the world, amongst other accomplishments in the pursuit of national interests. The decision to accept another person who looks different, talks in a different language or accent, eats a different kind of food, believes in a different religion and behaves differently from another, is a virtue that must be learnt and encouraged of one’s countrymen if that nation must thrive. The benefits of practicing tolerance to others different in many ways from us, far outweighs the alternative.

On one hand, it has been widely propagated for us to love each other if we must co-exist in any given geographic provision. The government often advocates for love in times of conflict even if they do so only overtly. Love is also preached by the different kinds of religions we practice. So, consciously or unconsciously, love is being offered as the solution to racial, ethnic and all other forms of conflict that exists in our communities. If we learn to love each other, then we could live in harmony and peace. I beg to disagree.

Love could be the answer. But centuries and centuries of human conflicts have continued to prove that love alone doesn’t cut it. Love doesn’t stop couples –no matter how much they love each other — from having conflicts from time to time. Sure, it helps, but it sure isn’t a bulletproof approach to ending conflicts. You see, to love another person, entails one to trust such a person to an above average level, to be patient and forgiving to such a person when he or she errs. The practicability of that happening on the kind of scale that is required to solve racial injustice, for instance, is simply impossible.

However, there is the option of tolerance. In the real sense and practice of the word, “tolerance”, loving someone else becomes only a secondary notion. The primary objective of practicing tolerance is simply to understand that differences exist between the two or multiple parties involved, that can’t be wished away. Therefore, the onus is on those parties to learn to get along, regardless of their cultural, physical, structural or even individual differences.

Hence, in the long run, exhibiting tolerance is a far more valuable life skill than learning to love. The reality of our world today is, there are ideological, sociological and psychological differences that are simply irreconcilable. No matter how long we all sit at the table, we cannot and in most cases, will not, agree at the end of the day, to accept certain things.

It is for this reason that some white supremacists, long after colonialism, slavery and segregation, cannot move past the point of looking at a black person as inferior to them. It’s for the same reason that sexual orientation today is still a big debate and even with the backing of several governments around the world, the LGBT communities, individuals and groups of people who haven’t accepted those differences as a new reality, continue to pose a threat to those who come out of the closet.

In conclusion, love is arguably the most potent human bond there is. For those that we have come to love, we do more than just get along; we embrace each other’s weaknesses and overlook our flaws. That comes from a forgiving place, a place of mutual trust. While it is completely possible to love foreigners or others completely different from what we are comfortable with, it is in fact a humongous feat to achieve. In order to foster real peace and the kind of unity that guarantees safety for all, we must begin by exhibiting tolerance. It doesn’t mean we must love the black guy, forgive the black guy for being black, or even accept his different culture. It, however, means that we must come to terms with the fact that he is black and won’t be turning white anytime soon in the foreseeable future. Because he is black, he would most likely have interests and hobbies you won’t approve of. He might like rap, and he might like some real spicy soul food. Whatever the case might be, he is different not by choice but by a prerogative of creation. Learning to tolerate those differences is essential in acceptance and it is only by accepting these truths that we can live and let live. Building unity and peaceful coexistence between multiple ethnic and racial divides, becomes way easier upon that realization.